Hear me, O daughter, and listen well. I am far from complimented by your affections, particularly in such a manner as you have offered them to me. I must point out to you how foolish it was to try to win my affection by claiming that you would rather shut yourself away in a nunnery than be wife to a man besides me. I, too, would prefer that you close yourself away behind the walls of the church and devote yourself and your affections to Christ and virtuousness than see you the wife of any man, myself included. Your desire to wed does you no favors and only tempts you to allow yourself to indulge in such worldly distractions as children, finances, and attending to the needs and desires of your husband.
Besides these truths, I am a man of God, and I live in celibacy. I will take no wife and will leave no children behind me. My love is only for God, as yours should be, and to ask me to cease my adorations and pledge them to you in the stead of the Lord, betrays your love as being childish and selfish in nature. If you truly love someone, you would want for them only a life of celibacy and devotion for God, for this would ensure the well-being of their immortal soul in heaven, and this you should desire for your love above all else. That you would rather pull me down from my virtue for your own happiness would have me proclaim you nothing more than a desirous young woman who would do well to control herself in the face of temptation lest she fall from grace and lose her soul in the bargain. By this, I would also surmise that such a woman as you would do poorly as a sister of the church, and far better for you to find an earthly man to be earthly wife to and bare earthly children than to attempt to be so virtuous and fall as you so probably would.
I cannot approve of the many pleas you made to me in your letter, no matter how prettily or virtuously they may have been presented for my sake. To be in such haste to marry a man you have met scarce more than a time or two simply cannot bode well for the state of your will. My distaste for the sexual desires of the flesh are well known to you, as you yourself alluded to in your letter, and yet you would desire such an act so eagerly that you write to a man and propose a courtship you must know would be refused you. I admit that I cannot understand what would have led you to such a foolish action. I must condemn it, lest you, or any others who look to me for council, think that such behavior is acceptable for young people.
But despite all of this, my dearest sister in Christ, I may offer you some small praise. That you would desire to give your love to one who is devoted to God and holiness as I am would speak well of you, had you had the good sense not to act on that desire and seek to break the bonds of his devotion. That the virtuous man is your desire, that you would see as worthy a man whose immortal soul will most surely reach heaven proves that you understand the goodness of these actions. Surely you must know in your heart, that any man you love ought be left to his prayers and that you should not seek to remove him from his holy habits. However, should such a man choose to pursue you of his own accord, it might perhaps be best for you to agree to the marriage immediately so that you may ensure his continued dedication to Christ and God. For another woman might wish to have his love that she might enjoy earthly pleasures and give no care for the sacrifice he has made for her. Since you have learned early that virtuous men deserve to keep their devotion, you might be such a wife as leaves her husband to his prayers and perhaps will bear virgins of such caliber as to be more than worthy of a life of purity and celibacy and devotion to God.
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