Ask Marie

Dear Marie,

My dearest friend in the whole world has just gotten married. His new wife is absolutely the most wonderful woman I’ve ever known. Her virtue is unquestionable, her beauty is astonishing, her breeding impeccable, and she has the cutest nose I’ve ever seen!

Although this is the first time I’ve ever met her in person, I’ve heard so much about her that I feel as though I’ve always known her, heart and soul! Although I’ve sent her presents before, I’ve only just gotten the chance to go to my friend’s home and meet her in person. I’m utterly in love with her! I know it’s wrong, and I’ve tried to talk myself out of it, but Love has a hold on me and I just can’t bear not to be with her. I think I would go mad, and that would be terrible for everyone, including my friend!

I’m going to speak to her today, to tell her how I feel. How desperately I love her, that I’ll do anything for her. But I’m so worried, Marie! What if she doesn’t love me back? What if I am scorned?

Love-struck King

Dear Love-struck,

It sounds to me like you’ve got a real problem! On the one hand, your decision is going to put your friend in a very tight spot, especially since you’re his king. He owes you his loyalty regardless of your actions. However it sounds as if the relationship you have with your friend would be forever damaged by any breach of faith.

You are certainly taking a big risk by telling this woman that you love her, in more ways than one! As much as you are worried she’ll say no, have you thought at all about what will happen if she says yes? How are you going to maintain a contract of love with her and a contract of friendship with him all at once?

In the end, you will have to accept her decision as it comes. If she’s as virtuous a woman as you say, she might turn you down flat and you might have to learn to move on! On the other hand, it is generally agreed that love and marriage aren’t always one and the same. Perhaps, if the two of you truly love each other, you will be able to find a way to manage your conflicting relationships.

Best of luck!

Marie

Dear Marie,

I’m so stressed! I’ve been having a secret affair with my king for a long time now, and everything’s been going wonderfully! I love him so much, and he has said often that he would give me the world if he could! My husband has no idea that we’ve been seeing each other, because the king let out rumors he is to be bled, when in reality he calls me to his side! It’s all so wonderful.

But I’m really starting to worry! Because of how often the king gets “bled”, the kingdom has begun to talk. He has remained unmarried and faithful to me, so he has no heirs, and his advisors are beginning to press him into taking a wife! I think they’re afraid that his ill-health will lead to an early death with no son to take his throne.

Marie, I just don’t know what to do! I don’t think I could bear to see him with another woman, even though I know it would only be for political reasons. But I can’t leave my husband! Sometimes I find myself wishing my husband would just die so that my lover and I could be free to marry and all these problems should just go away.

Wishful Widow

Dear Wishful,

These concerns of yours about your lover’s potential marriage, as reasonable as it is for you to be having them, are extremely dangerous! If you have reached the point of wishing harm on your husband, then you are certainly treading on thin moral ice here. I’ve often reminded my readers that marriage and love are hardly one and the same, and royal marriages are especially political in nature. It seems to me that your king desperately needs a wife, and you two desperately need a better excuse for getting together than his being bled. Rumors of the ill-health of a king can be devesting to the well-being of a kingdom, and he owes it to his people to either fulfill his duties or relinquish them.

Are you sure that you can’t find a reasonable way to leave your husband? Perhaps if you spoke with him directly, and confessed the situation, he might be able to help. He won’t be happy about the secrets, but it’s in his best interest as well to ensure the safety of the kingdom.

I’m glad you two are happy, but I think you both need to consider the cost of your love, and ask yourself if there isn’t a better way for this story to end for everyone.

Marie

Dear Marie,

I’m not sure what good writing to you is really going to do for me, but I just need to talk to someone and don’t know who else to turn to. I’m in kind of a horrible place right now. I’ve….well, I’ve had a lot happen in a very short time, and things seem pretty grim. I recently discovered that my wife has been having an affair for ages now with my best friend. They’ve kept it from me for so long, and I just don’t know how to feel because…

Okay, well, the only reason I even found out was that, apparently, they had planned to kill me! They were going to boil me in a bath! But I guess I showed up too early because I caught them together, and my friend….instead of facing me, he just jumped into the boiling tub and killed himself. After that, I barely know what happened. I was so grieved and angry, that I just grabbed my wife and threw her in after him. I killed her! And now they’re both dead, and I’ve lost the woman I loved and my dearest friend, and the kingdom is in ruins because my friend, the king, wasn’t married and didn’t have any heirs to leave behind.

I don’t know what to do now! Everything is in chaos and my life is ruined. All because my best friend and my wife couldn’t keep the promises they made to me. How do I cope?

Angry in Mourning

Dear Angry,

Your feelings are valid, even if your choice to drown your wife was downright terrible. I’m sorry that your friend betrayed you this way, and I’m sorry that he thought death a better option than facing you and the consequences of his actions.

I’m afraid that this is a wound only time can heal, if it ever heals at all.

I wish you and your kingdom the best of luck, and also advise that you turn yourself in to the authorities for murder, or at least run away and become a monk.

Marie

Dear Marie,

This is kind of a long story, but...here we go! So, I met this guy, and he was handsome and kind and brave and everything I’ve ever wanted! We got together and he swore his love and devotion to me, and I promised him anything he could want and more. We were perfect together! So happy! Only, there was this rule that he had to keep it all a secret, right? Because, well, I’m kind of breaking a lot of rules being with him, and I really don’t want to deal with the trouble that would come to us both if anyone found out.

He promised he wouldn’t tell, but then he got into this fight with the Queen. She was trying to get him to have an affair with her and when he refused she accused him of all kinds of disloyalty and immorality, and in defense of his honor he mentioned that he loved a woman far more honorable than her. Naturally, she got pissed and ran straight to her husband, the king, and accused my love of trying to force her to have an affair with him and of insulting her honor. When the king brought my love to court, he admitted to slandering the queen in a moment of anger, but denied ever having wanted to be with her. But nobody believed him! They said he had to show them the woman more worthy than the queen, or he’d hang!

But the thing is, by then he’d remembered his promise and knew that he’d never see me again. He’d been calling me and desperately trying to bargain to get me back, but he’d broken his promise and that was that. So now, he’s going to formal trial today, and….I’m afraid he’s going to hang! I love him so much, and I don’t want him to die. But he broke his oath, and that’s just not something that can be ignored. What should I do, Marie??

Conflicted Lover

Dear Conflicted,

This is definitely a difficult situation. On the one hand, you’re right. Broken oaths aren’t something to be taken lightly. But on the other hand, neither is the death penalty! I think I can safely assume that neither of you suspected that keeping your love a secret would lead to a deadly situation. And in light of that, maybe it’s fair reconsider how strictly you need to reinforce this consequence. Of course some bells can’t be unrung, but if this one can, I think maybe it should be. After all, what good is it to anybody if he dies for his mistake?

Besides, I think he’s probably learned his lesson pretty well by now, what with facing death row and an angry king and all. How about you?

Marie