Dear Guinevere,
I’m ashamed to say this, but my married life with my husband hasn’t been fulfilling at all. He spends a great deal of his time hunting and riding with his knights instead of me, and we haven’t had "relations" in days. One of his knights has begun to take an interest in me – it’s very strange, since he’s a bit of a brute everywhere else but an emotional mess around me. He says that he would like to have me if my husband weren’t the king.
To be honest, I’m starting to like him more than my husband. He pays attention to me in a way that my husband doesn’t, and since I married the king as a prisoner I’ve come to realize that we never had a particularly loving relationship anyway. I think we just weren’t meant to be. How would you suggest hiding my affair so that my husband never finds out about it? I know doing this is extremely wrong, but I can’t take it anymore and I think it’ll be okay to have a relationship on the side while tolerating my husband, so long as I’m not caught.
Torn at Corbenic
Dear Torn,
It can be a very difficult thing for a queen to realize that she no longer loves her husband. Arthur and I went through a similar patch some time ago, and we never forgave each other for it. We had a complicated relationship – we were not a love match, but we were married for diplomatic reasons. When I came to realize that I didn’t really love Arthur, I was heartbroken, and was in a very similar place to where you are now, unsure of what to think and desperate for some emotion in my married life.I wanted lovemaking to be something I did for pleasure as opposed to just a chore.
For your situation, I certainly recommend listening to your personal feelings regarding this particular knight. Definitely get to know him better – if you bring out something unexpected in him, talk about the things you both enjoy, like books or hunting. This will help establish things that you two have in common before you start a relationship, even one on the side. In fact, establishing an emotional connection between you two is especially important, since from the sound of it your intention is to use him as a surrogate for the love and attention that your husband should be giving to you. It sems, you two have something special going on already. The only thing left is to help your budding relationship grow.
Don’t feel too sorry for your husband. There’s a good chance that he’s been thinking the same thing you are and is very likely seeing other women, too. I know for a fact that my Arthur was – that was definitely a remorse killer during my relationship with Lancelot. This way, both of you can put up the image of a stable ruling relationship while your affairs on the side help you keep up your emotional life. If you do not do this it will make the kingdom vulnerable to attack - this was the mistake I made, and it led to a disaster for Of course, it goes without saying that you have to be careful not to be caught. If you are, there is a good chance that you will deal with a civil war and public humiliation at best. I was almost killed by my own husband when my affair with Lancelot was discovered, for example, and he was in his legal rights to do so. Your lover will more than likely be exiled or executed. If you think the relationship is worth the danger, go for it - just don’t make the mistakes I did.
Just remember, it isn’t cheating until you get caught. We all want to have our happily-ever-after fairy tale endings. Unfortunately, it isn’t as easy as the fairy tales make it sound. I doubt that even those princesses were happy with their princes forever.
Have a happy relationship!
Gwenivere
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