City of Boss-Bitches

      One evening as I sat in my bed struggling through my physics homework, I decided that I deserved a break, and my natural place of leisure was tumblr. As I scrolled down the page I came across a gif of a Fox News reporter professing that young women should not be encouraged to vote, because they “don’t get it.” Below the gif there were reasons conservative media reports had produced to prove that young women shouldn’t perform their civic duty. They all basically came down to the same argument - young women do not have enough life experience to be making such significant decisions, and that people whose favorite show is ”Say Yes to the Dress” can’t sufficiently contribute to society. These ideas were so insulting to me I closed the tab immediately. How could these individuals believe this about my peers?

As I pondered these ideas I began to think of all the young women I knew who were definitely intelligent and well-informed enough to be making such an important decision. This led me to think of all the arguments against women that many other well-educated individuals have argued recently. If so many knowledgeable people drew these conclusions about the female gender, than can so many be wrong? I mean there is an entire political party partially devoted to making sure feminism and equal rights are completely discredited. I became so overwhelmed with all these ideas that I began to get really angry that I had a two x chromosomes and began to feel sorry for myself.

      

       As I lay in my bed pouting about my unfortunate existence a wicked bright light appeared, and then these three ladies materialized dressed in semi-matching outfits, like some 90s girl band.

The “Beyoncé” of the group addressed me first saying, “Don’t be afraid, for we have not come to do you any harm, we are here to comfort you. Our aim is to help you get rid of those misconceptions which have clouded your mind and made you reject what you know to be truth, just because so many other people have come out with the opposite opinion.”

I sat there in complete astonishment, and all I could manage to say was, “Um…okay, that sounds good I guess.”

The leader of the three then responded with, “Excellent. We have been sent to you by God, as we were sent to Christine de Pizan, so that you may construct a new city for women. We will assist you in this process. I, Reason, will help lay the groundwork, my sister, Rectitude, will help construct homes and buildings, and finally Justice will help finish the city skyline.”

This explanation didn’t comfort me and my only response was, “You were sent by God? To me? Professed atheist, Amanda Porter?”

To which Reason responded, “Yes, of course.”

“Well then I guess I owe someone 20$,” I said under my breath. “So, hypothetically speaking, let’s say you were sent from “God” and the brownie I had at M&Cs wasn’t laced with anything, how do you three expect me to construct an entire city? I have class at 8:35 tomorrow.”

“We will supply the tools and provide plenty of aid,” replied Rectitude.

“Well then, if this some type of weird drug induced psychosis I might as well lean into it, right?” and so began the construction of the City of Boss- Bitches (I got to name it).

Part I

As Reason and I began clearing the land with some machinery I probably should have a permit for, I decided to ask her the questions that had been really disturbing me.

       

      “So what do you think of the Fox anchor’s argument? I mean she isn’t wrong, there are a lot of young women who are only concerned with reality TV and have no life experience, they really shouldn’t be deciding who will run our country.”

      

        To which Reason responded, “How could you say such a thing? Look at yourself, you are well educated and you understand the significance of being able to participate in government. Not to mention the 2600 other young women you live with, who are probably more informed than the majority of people who do participate in voting. Do not let the opinions of these individuals detour you from participating in a right, which other women had to fight hard to earn. You are a citizen, and you and any other young woman have the right to participate in choosing you government officials.”

       

       “That is true. I do understand the struggle they went through and I appreciate that fight,” I answered her. “But it’s extremely discouraging when even today women are trashed for calling themselves a “feminist.”  I obviously believe that women are equal to men. But calling oneself a feminist is almost a bad word, it’s offensive for some reason, so I avoid doing it.”

       

       Reason retorted with, “The definition of a feminist is someone who believes in the social, political and economic equality of the sexes. So by definition you are a feminist, whether you want to be called one or not. There are many intelligent and successful women that are proud to call themselves feminists, such as Emma Watson, who has become a goodwill ambassador. She has addressed this issue in many speeches, and she has determined that the reason why many women have chosen not to label themselves as feminist is because they are afraid of being too aggressive and isolating men; essentially they don’t want to seem anti-male. This may stem from the fact that in most of your societies young girls are encouraged to worry about the feelings and opinions of men; that those opinions are more important than your own. But I am telling you that you should label yourself as a feminist, because that is what you are. And instead of worrying about offending men, we should be educating them that feminism is not synonymous with man-hating.”

       

        “I guess I had never seen it that way,” I responded once we finished leveling the area where we were beginning construction.

       

        “I shall remove all of the piles of dirt and waste we have accumulated in an environmentally-friendly fashion. I hope that I was able to provide you with some comfort and advice on the subject of feminism.  Rectitude shall be along shortly to help you begin construction on the buildings.”

Part II

       

       While Rectitude (whom I nick-named Solange) and I began construction on the homes and other buildings for our new city, I updated her on the discussion I was having with Reason, about women who didn’t want to be labeled as feminist.

       

       Rectitude looked to me and said, “If more women in your society began calling themselves feminists, then it would become less taboo and poorly received. Like the artist Beyoncé, she is a self-proclaimed feminist, but she is clearly a valued member of your society, she is successful, and has many male fans.”

       

       This response prompted me to ask, “So does God support feminism and equal rights? I mean I know he sent you here, but it seems like he has contributed very little to changing the opinions of many, not to mention the fact that most religions are extremely sexist.”

       

       “Of course God supports this mission, or he would not have put you to this task. Religious works are often the product of man interpreting the word of God, and over time that can become very convoluted.  And our Lord greatly enjoys the works of Beyoncé.”

       

       “Huh, never would have guessed that one,” I said to myself quietly. “So what do you think of women that completely renounce feminism? Like those who strongly believe women are not equal to men and that it is ruining families, like what’s-her-face, Phyllis Schlafly.”

        

        Rectitude thought to herself for a moment before answering me, “Everyone is entitled to believe whatever is true for them. I do not know this Phyllis Schlafly, but it seems to me that when a woman renounces her own rights, and that of her peers, she is trying to defend something she feels is attacked. I believe the blonde comedian you like sums up my feelings on this nicely.”

       

       “Chelsea Handler?” I ask astonished.  

“No, no the one on the government show,” Rectitude answers. “Oh Amy Poehler!” I shout in excitement.

      

       “Yes, her, she has commented on this and she has said that for a women to renounce feminism is like saying ‘I don’t really believe in cars, but I drive one every day and I love that it gets me places and makes my life so much easier.’ If these women did in fact lose these rights that others fought so hard for, I believe they would feel very differently.”

       

       “I love her, she is so witty. And that is a very valid point. It is rather hypocritical. I guess I just don’t understand how a woman could validate not being paid as much as a man for the same work or how she could stand to not have someone else make decisions about her own body. I get that the right wing media has found ways to concoct theories to fight against these fundamental rights, I guess I just don’t understand how a woman, who has experienced these things, could believe them to be true. ”

       

       “See!” Rectitude prompted me, “You are a feminist and you are beginning to see how those ideas perpetuated about women are wrong. Now that we have finished the construction of the buildings I will retrieve Justice, so the two of you may finish construction and populate your city.”

Part III

       “I see that you have made quick work of the task set to you,” said Justice (aka Kelly Roland) as she arrived at the construction site. “Have you put any thought to the sort of women you would like to reside here?”

       “Well I have had a lot of help,” I responded. “And yes, I have. I want this to be a place for all those women who are strong and wise to be able to live freely. I want this to be a home for all those girls that are called bossy and bitchy, because they are assertive and they know that they are equal to men. I know now that I fit into that category.”

       “Well, as the great Tina Fey has said, ‘Bitches get stuff done,’” Justice responded. “What are you going to call your city of assertive, productive women?”

       I thought to myself and then responded with, “The city of Boss-Bitches. Those are titles we should be proud of, not ashamed of. We are going to take them back, so that no one can use them to hurt us.”

       “And who shall be your queen?” asked Justice.

       “We won’t have a queen, we will have a president. The bossiest, bitchiest of them all, Hillary Clinton.”