Radegund, Heaven, and Grad School

 Many nobles in the Middle Ages were preordained to rule by the grace of God. So, naturally, you’d think they would have a hall pass to Heaven. However, some of the queens in the Middle Ages did not necessarily believe this. Some were revered as extraordinarily holy women. Not all queens, however, wished for this high honor (*cough cough* Theodora). One example was Queen Radegund; born of royal blood, sunken down to a plunder of war, and once again reclaiming her status through marriage. During her childhood, she clung to the belief that she would one day join God in marriage.

While reading about Radegund, I could not help but think of her long list of achievements as something like a resume for why this woman should be in a high position in Heaven. Good deeds were tallied like brownie points. And somehow, all these brownie points she earned on Earth were supposed to be cashed in like chips from Las Vegas casinos when gaining entrance into Heaven. Okay, simple. One good deed equals one brownie point. But it seemed as though the queens who subjected themselves to the lowly lives of the poor earned exponential brownie points because they were royal. So I guess God favors those who fall, or in this case descend, to a lowly life so that they can rise again in Heaven. At this point, it seems as though the highest positions on Earth go to those who are predestined by God to fill them. And somehow the highest positions in Heaven are also destined for the same people. This makes me question my decision on physical therapy school. I really should be applying to “rule the world” schools. The Bible does say that a rich man needs to be humble in order to gain the rights to Heaven, which Radegund clearly did. But how are the rest of us supposed to be admitted into Heaven? As many of us are realizing, we need to climb as far up the ladder of success as possible to “make it in the world.” It’s interesting to think that after climbing so far, we must then descend back down to gain passage to Heaven. What’s interesting is that Radegund was born of royal blood; she did not earn it. She was born into a high social class whereas we strive for it. If they only had to strive in one direction to gain access to Heaven, should not we have the same right in today's world?

Regardless...As the story progressed, I imagined Radegund would be waiting in the long line for the pearly gates and when she finally reached Saint Peter, she would hand him her resume and application to Heaven. Saint Peter would read it, conduct an impromptu interview, and she’d get a stamp of admission.

Great, now she’s in Heaven. Journey concluded. It felt like the story written about her was a grocery list of what she had accomplished. I found myself skimming through the deeds checking off in my head, “pious act,” “holy person-good for you,” “teachers pet” and “how do you and Helena find His cross?!” At the time I was reading it, I was working on editing my resume for graduate school applications. So every time I saw another good deed, I thought: “volunteer/community service”: Washing the feet of the poor and treating wounds, “Leadership roles”: Queen of the Franks. How do you beat that? I was dearly hoping graduate school admissions would not be as difficult as Heaven admissions. Under “activities” there would be: “wearing a hair shirt under royal garments for holy torture” and “sleeping on the cold floor.”

For her application she would most likely put under “things you would like us to know about you”: “I wanted to grow up to be a martyr” and “After washing the feet of the poor, I would dry the feet with my own hair I could.”

 After I finished the excerpt, I could envision Saint Peter stamping her application saying: “After calculating your score, you have received 2,000 points out of a possible 100. Congratulations, welcome to Heaven.” Now if only graduate schools would be so willing to admit me on more reasonable terms than Heaven.